Saturday, December 31, 2005

2005 Movie Haiku Index

So as the year draws to a close I thought I'd publish a handy index of all the films that I've seen at the cinema this year - yes, all 113 of them - alongside my star rating for each. Click on the film title to read the haiku... and review, where applicable.

I actually saw 116 films in total at the cinema - I ended up seeing The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, The Devil's Rejects and Born To Fight all twice - so beating last year's total by nine.

Only seven films attained the coveted five star rating, although in hindsight The Devil's Rejects should have been given the maximum rating, but I missed the last fifteen minutes of it on my first viewing. Looking back, I stand by all my star ratings except perhaps for The Aviator, Be Cool and Fantastic Four who appear to have benefited from some overly generous reviews and in retrospect ought to lose a star each. And I only walked out of two films this year - The Sea Inside and Day Of The Dead 2: Contagium.

Friday, December 30, 2005

2005 Review - Films of the Year

Okay, so my final list is going to cover my favourite - and least favourite - films from the past twelve months... And I've had a lot of films to choose from this year!

(2004 Winner - Oldboy)

Best films of 2005:

  1. DiG!
  2. The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou
  3. The Devil's Rejects
  4. The Descent
  5. Wolf Creek
  6. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
  7. Sin City
  8. 2046
  9. Into The Blue
  10. Closer
Oddly enough, DiG! was the one film that I didn't actually see at the cinema, as I'd already imported the US DVD by the time it got released in the UK.

Worst films of 2005:

  1. Revolver
  2. Stealth
  3. xXx2:The Next Level
  4. The Dukes Of Hazzard
  5. Cursed
Tomorrow: I'm going to publish a handy index of all the films that I've seen at the cinema this year.

Immi & Nerina announce Brighton dates!

Wahey! Two of my favourite female singer / songwriters - who both made it into yesterday's Albums of the Year list - have just announced Brighton shows for 2006!

Imogen Heap will be playing at the Komedia on Wednesday 5th April.

Full tour details on www.imogenheap.com

Meanwhile Nerina Pallot will be playing in town the following month when she appears at St George's Church, Kemptown on Saturday 27th May.

Full tour details on www.nerinapallot.com

What with Juliana Hatfield playing her first live UK show in ten years at London's Bush Hall on Wednesday 8th March, it's looking like 2006 could be another bumper year for great live music!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

2005 Review - Albums of the Year

Right, following on from yesterday's Songs of the Year, here's my list of favourite albums from the past twelve months.

(2004 Winner - Nouvelle Vague - Nouvelle Vague)

Best albums of 2005:
  1. The Duke Spirit - Cuts Across The Land
  2. Coldplay - X & Y
  3. Imogen Heap - Speak For Yourself
  4. The Dandy Warhols - Odditorium Or Warlords Of Mars
  5. Nine Inch Nails - With Teeth
  6. Joy Zipper - The Heartlight Set
  7. Louis XIV - The Best Little Secrets Are Kept
  8. Nerina Pallot - Fires
  9. Madonna - Confessions On A Dancefloor
  10. Goldfrapp - Supernature

Tomorrow: Films of the Year

Warming Up with Richard Herring

"But surely Jesus got the best view, getting the hilarity of both the drinking cat and the fat defecating man."

This is the funniest story I've read all Christmas... you can enjoy the full post here!

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

2005 Review - Songs of the Year

Moving on from yesterday's Gigs of the Year, here's my list of favourite songs from the past twelve months. In my opinion only two of these artists managed to release consistently good albums this year, but you'll have to wait until tomorrow to find out who they are!

(2004 Winner - U2 - Vertigo)

Best songs of 2005:
  1. Gorillaz - Dare
  2. Arcade Fire - Rebellion (Lies)
  3. Ladytron - Sugar
  4. The Bravery - An Honest Mistake
  5. Mylo - In Your Arms
  6. Imogen Heap - Hide And Seek
  7. Ladytron - Destroy Everything You Touch
  8. The Subways - Oh Yeah
  9. Gemma Hayes - Happy Sad
  10. Madonna - Hung Up

Tomorrow: Albums of the Year

Do you speak Engrish?

Thanks to Troy who pointed me towards www.engrish.com over the Christmas break.

"Engrish can be simply defined as the humorous English mistakes that appear in Japanese advertising and product design."

Here's some of my favourite examples from their website:

Check it out, there's a new addition every day...

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

2005 Review - Gigs of the Year

It's that time of the year when everyone looks back at the past year and publishes lots of lists, so over the next few days I thought I'd post a few of my own, starting today with my favourite gigs that I've been to this year.

(2004 Winner - The Soundtrack Of Our Lives at London Astoria)

Best gigs of 2005:
  1. Soulwax at Brighton Concorde
  2. Heather Nova at Shepherds Bush Empire
  3. Nine Inch Nails at Brixton Academy
  4. Emiliana Torrini at Brighton Komedia
  5. Goldfrapp at Brighton Dome

Tomorrow: Songs of the Year

Monday, December 26, 2005

Christmas Dinner

Spit-roasted barbecue pork with potato wedges, barbecue beans, corn fritters and a tangy apple sauce... mmmmm, delicious!

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone, I hope you all have a happy and peaceful Christmas Day.

I'd like to thank a few friends who've helped to make my Christmas extra special:

Troy & Rom for taking me in on Christmas Day.

Steve & Chrissy for lunch on Boxing Day.

Kelly for making Fairytale Of New York the first song I heard this morning.

Gary at HD2 for my festive viewing and listening pleasures.

Rich for the exceptionally tasteful present.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Sincerely Kate

It's my last afternoon at work before Christmas and I've been randomly blogging, seeking inspiration. I pinched this little Q&A from Kate's blog...

my name is: not soulmining

childhood ambition: to be a writer

fondest memory: nine months in cape town when I was six years old

soundtrack: twenty years of vinyl & cds

retreat: a good book

wildest dream: travelling the world with my best friend

proudest moment: graduating in brighton

biggest challenge: lack of confidence

alarm clock: hello kitty

perfect day: a good movie, hanging out with loved ones, live music

first job: stock room in woolworths

indulgence: world cinema

last purchase: ong-bak on dvd

favorite movie: dazed and confused

inspiration: other people's words

my life: is only just beginning

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Taller In More Ways?

So, after six years together and four number one hit singles in the UK, the Sugababes have lost a second founder member.

So it's time to say goodbye to the rather scary-yet-weirdly-sexy Mutya Buena (centre)...
...And say hello to Amelle Berrabah (right).

Hmmmm...

Quite how the band will survive with only one of its founder members still in its line up remains to be seen... but I guess it didn't harm them last time, did it?

BKKIFF is Go!!

I've always been keen to attend some events at the Bangkok International Film Festival ever since Dave and I stumbled across the world premiere screening of Ong Bak there back in January 2003.

So this year, while thinking ahead to my Winter break, I thought I'd try and time my holiday to coincide with the 2006 BKKIFF in February. And then I had an even better idea - since I've been contributing some reviews to Eat My Brains this year, why not try and apply for Press accreditation? Since August I've been in contact with a lady in their Press Office who's been really helpful - advising me to send my application directly to her, bypassing their London office altogether - and with the help of Mike from EMB I submitted the relevant documents, buoyed with the news that fellow contributor David had just successfully secured a Press pass for this year's London Film Festival.

Finally yesterday, the news I'd been waiting for: my application has been approved! I am a bundle of nervous energy... I'm so excited about this, yet at the same time, absolutely sh*tting myself! I've no idea what's in store for me, but you can be sure that I'll be blogging about it here in February...

www.bangkokfilm.org

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Celebrate Good Times!

Okay, so who'd like a chocolate?

My drawer is currently full of Celebrations as I appear to be the only person in the office who is able to exercise self-restraint when it comes to eating chocolates.

Some time later...

Hmmm... well, they were in my drawer but the office gluttons seem to have exercised a mutiny.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Christmas Party

Me, Darren and Dom (photo by Helen)

I've just found a picture of me from last week's office Christmas meal down at the Seattle Hotel.

I was full of the 'space virus' at the time so I'm going to be well up for our proper Christmas party when it finally takes place in January...

Movie Haiku - King Kong

www.kingkongmovie.com


Dir: Peter Jackson


Cast: Naomi Watts, Jack Black, Adrien Brody, Jamie Bell


They find a big ape

doesn't want to be on stage

so goes plane swatting


soulmining rating: ****

Monday, December 19, 2005

Brighton Pier

While strolling home along the seafront last night in a rather melancholic frame of mind I felt compelled to take a photo of all the pretty Christmas lights.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

More Kitson Gold

Daniel Kitson is touring again.

A show about balloons, unmanned sheepdogs, comic shops that stay open until 3am, and leaves.

If you haven't seen Dan perform his maverick brand of stand-up comedy before then you should go and see him.

And if you have seen him before, well, you should go and see him again.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Little Britain Live at Brighton Centre

photograph courtesy of www.davidwalliams.com

There's no denying that Little Britain Live is a slick stage show, with its moving furniture and video backdrops lending an overtly theatrical feel to the comedy creations of Matt Lucas and David Walliams. This new ninety minute production showcases the most popular characters from the three television series, with Lucas's portrayal of Vicky Pollard, Fat Fighters' Marjorie Dawes, and Daffyd Thomas (the only gay in the village) receiving the greatest applause from the rather subdued audience. The inherent problem with a sketch show transferring to the live arena is its over-familiarity (see also: The Fast Show) and so it proved to be here, with some sketches - especially the newer characters - just being exact copies from the current series. I found more enjoyment watching some of their earlier creations make a welcome return, notably Scotsman Ray Cooney, hypnotist Kenny Craig, and children's comic Des Kay - with the latter's game of 'hide the sausage' with two members of the audience proving both hilarious yet excruciating to watch! The biggest cheer of the evening came during the encore when the show was interrupted by Denise Van Outen (with film crew in tow) who came on stage to present Matt and David with their British Comedy Award for Best TV Comedy - which was being broadcast live on ITV at the time!

Play It Cool In December

I've been listening to a lot more music this past month and have been spoilt for choice with my top five picks for December. Narrowly missing the cut were Gorillaz, Tristan Prettyman, The Decemberists, Bird, Athlete and Bloc Party, but maybe they'll feature next month if I'm still listening to them then... here's my top five CDs then:
  • Madonna - Confessions On A Dancefloor (Warner Bros)
  • The Dissociatives - The Dissociatives (Eleven)
  • Erin McKeown - We Will Become Like Birds (Parlophone)
  • The Brian Jonestown Massacre - We Are The Radio (Tee Pee)
  • The Beta Band - The Best Of - Music (Regal)

With any luck Arcade Fire will be in January's list!

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Movie Haiku - The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe

www.narnia.com


Dir: Andrew Adamson


Cast: Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, William Moseley, Tilda Swinton


Strange world in wardrobe

see Winstone's talking beaver

help lion beat witch


soulmining rating: ***

Monday, December 12, 2005

Rebellion (Lies)

Making a last gasp attempt to grab the coveted 'song of the year' award is Rebellion (Lies) from the album Funeral by Arcade Fire.

I was in Rounder Records on Sunday as they were playing this track and just had to ask them what it was... I would have bought the album straight away, but it's already top of my list for Christmas, so hopefully I'll be getting it later this month anyway.

Courtney, why didn't I listen to you back in March?

Dom, why wouldn't you lend me this album months ago, you git!

I feel that I have arrived rather late to this party... www.arcadefire.com

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Christmas Shopping

Apparently sales of tinsel are down this year.

I've just braved the hordes of shoppers and bought my first Christmas present. I feel quite light-headed.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Reflections on 2005

[ Aaaah, publishing under the influence... I have now re-read, edited and updated this post with added links! I was going to add some photos but I'm just too hungover - there are quite a few if you click on the links though. soulmining - 09/12/05 17:33pm ]

I don't often post personal stuff on here but I saw this Q&A on Tatiana's website and thought I'd nick it and share my own reflections on the past year with you all.

1) Was 2005 a good year for you?

I’m finishing the year in a positive and optimistic frame of mind. Work hasn’t been very fulfilling this year, but starting this blog and writing about the films and gigs that I love has opened up a number of doors for me which I wouldn’t have believed twelve months ago.

2) What was your favourite moment of the year?

Hanging out at the FrightFest launch party with the Eat My Brains guys, taking full advantage of the free bar and chatting to Simon Pegg and Chris Smith. I also recall driving back from Crawley late at night in the middle of a snowstorm was quite a magical (if a little scary) experience and really reminded me of my childhood days up North when we used to get snow all the time!

3) What was your least favourite moment of the year?

Watching the news of the London bombings unfold just hours after returning from The Descent premiere party in Leicester Square.

4) Where will you be when 2005 ends?

I'll be somewhere in Brighton, most likely at home.

5) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?

Don’t know yet. I’m not one for making big New Year plans so it’ll be a last minute thing as always, dependent on who’s around. Last year I welcomed in the New Year on my own, watching the fireworks along Marine Parade.

6) Did you keep your New Year’s resolution of 2005?

I don’t remember making any New Year’s resolutions, but looking back at my diary I apparently made three of them. The first was to see my cousin Paul who I hadn’t seen for three years – we went to Goodison Park to watch Everton play Chelsea in February. The second was to cut down on sugar which has been a partial success – I’m down from three sachets to two in coffee. The third was to be more confident around women – I’m naturally shy – which I think I have achieved.

7) Do you have any New Year's resolutions for 2006?

Nothing concrete… perhaps something healthy like drinking more water and eating more fruit and veg?

8) Did you fall in love in 2005?

No, I just had a number of small, unrequited crushes.

9) Do you regret it?

Not at all. No regrets.

10) Did you break up with anyone in 2005?

No, not to my knowledge.

11) Did you make any new friends in 2005?

Yes, definitely, and I'd like to take the time to thank them here:

Mike – you’ve become a close and valued friend this year and I really appreciate all the support and encouragement that you’ve given me with my movie-related writing. Russ – it was great to finally meet you at The Descent premiere, and the FrightFest events since then have been such a blast in your company. David – thanks for sharing the load on the festival review and it was great to see you in Brighton for The Rakes & Louis XIV. James – I’m full of admiration for what you’ve achieved this year, your enthusiasm is infectious. Thanks for agreeing to be my second interviewee and I wish you continued success in 2006! Kelly – I’ve only just met you recently and am still getting to know you but your words are always full of warmth and honesty and always put a smile on my face.

There’s also a few fellow bloggers that I’ve never met but consider to be new friends: Nikita – thanks for your advice and insight into life in Hong Kong; Courtney – yours was one of the first blogs I ever discovered and has become one of my essential bookmarks. Thanks for all your musical tips this year! Tatiana – thanks for sharing your tales of life on the LA rock scene, your writing inspires me like no other.

12) What was your favourite month of 2005?

May, for a number of reasons: Brighton Festival took over the city; Everton qualified for the Champions League; Dave and Justin came back to Brighton after five months away; FrightFest’s one day event at the Prince Charles Cinema in London.

13) Did you travel outside of the UK in 2005?

Sadly not this year.

14) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?

We lost our family cat, Pickles.

15) Did you miss anybody in the past year?

I didn’t see my family as much as I should have. I haven’t seen my friend Chris – who became a father last year – since January and I keep meaning to pick up the phone to call him to see how he is.

16) What was your favourite movie that you saw in 2005?

Ironically the one film I didn’t see at the cinema – DiG!

17) What was your favourite song from 2005?

An Honest Mistake by The Bravery, or maybe Dare by Gorillaz, or maybe Sugar by Ladytron. They’re my top three tunes.

18) What was your favourite record from 2005?

I’ll probably post a list later this month, but if I had to choose one record it would be Cuts Across The Land by The Duke Spirit.

19) How many concerts did you see in 2005?

Forty-six.

20) Did you have a favourite concert in 2005?

I’ve seen some great gigs this year but the one that really stands out was Soulwax at the Concorde in Brighton back in February. It was also good to finally see Nine Inch Nails and New Order play live this year.

21) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005?

Yes, a fair amount. This year I discovered Jim Beam & ginger ale!

22) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?

None. Well, one cigarette – does that count?

23) How many people did you sleep with in 2005?

Unless I get lucky in the next three weeks, none!

24) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?

Playing devil’s advocate between a couple of friends who’d fallen out with each another. Complaining about working conditions without realizing that one of my colleagues was even more worse off than myself.

25) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?

One of my friends quit smoking this year and still insists that they have given up when I know for a fact that they haven’t.

26) What was the best practical joke that you played in 2005?

We’ve done tons in the office this year. The best ones were signing up Bennett to the G4 mailing list and downloading their songs onto his iPod, and sticking lots of Ocean Colour Scene AAA passes onto Dom’s jacket and him not realising until he was being served at the counter in the Pound shop.

27) What was your proudest moment of 2005?

Being asked to be Best Man at Stephen & Caroline’s wedding was a great honour. Also, doing my first feature for EMB and having the director say that I’d handled the interview “professionally and sensitively”.

28) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?

Blatantly flirting with DJ Steve's girlfriend for about an hour right in front of him (while he was on the decks) was pretty bad - although in fairness we were both very drunk. Getting threatened by EMI Records for trying to sell a promo Fischerspooner CD on eBay was pretty embarrassing as well.

29) If you could go back in time to one moment in time in 2005 and change something what would it be?

Hmmmm… maybe staying in the pub with Natalie during the comedy festival would have been fun, although perhaps might have ended up as one of the moments I was most ashamed of. I might also have ensured that I’d booked days off work to attend EMB’s “Night Of The Night Of Movies Night” Zombie Club event, and James’ Severance screening. And perhaps I’d have made sure I’d charged my camera battery before seeing The Pipettes at the Pavilion Theatre in January.

30) What are your plans for 2006?

I’m hoping to spend some time in Hong Kong and Thailand next year, and will endeavour to continue my writings and make the most of any opportunities that come my way in 2006.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Sheep's Heels

Justin and me, out of focus

Justin is flying out tomorrow to spend the next five months living in Thailand, so yesterday we got together, along with Andy and Gary, for an eight hour drinking binge.

Aaaah, lunchtime drinking. Always conducive to the important questions of the day, like these ones...

How come Andy's photos are out of focus when he's a professional photographer?

Is XXXXX XXX really homophobic?

Who's seen Dave's plums?

If Andy invented chamois shorts then would people shine car windscreens at street corners using their backsides?

Should the apostrophe in "sheep's heels" remain in the same place even when you're referring to multiple sheep?

Did my ex-girlfriend have a bit of a 'tache? (Gee, thanks guys)

I smoked a cigarette for the first time in two years. And ate a whole jam roly-poly when I got home.

F*** knows how I didn't have a raging hangover this morning.

Have a great trip, Justin.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Movie Haiku - Doom

www.doommovie.com


Dir: Andrzej Bartkowiak


Cast: The Rock, Karl Urban, Rosamund Pike, Dexter Fletcher


Something's loose on Mars

big guns in dark corridors

films of games bore me


soulmining rating: **

Movie Haiku - Transporter 2

www.transporter2movie.com


Dir: Louis Leterrier


Cast: Jason Statham, Alessandro Gassman, Amber Valletta, Jason Flemyng


He must protect boy

how can this sequel be good?

love stupid fight scenes


soulmining rating: ****

Monday, December 05, 2005

Movie Haiku - The Exorcism Of Emily Rose

www.couldthishappentoyou.co.uk


Dir: Scott Derrickson


Cast: Laura Linney, Tom Wilkinson, Campbell Scott, Jennifer Carpenter


Priest on murder trial

did the devil possess her

or was she just ill?


soulmining rating: ****

Movie Haiku - Flightplan

www.thefilmfactory.co.uk/flightplan


Dir: Robert Schwentke


Cast: Jodie Foster, Peter Sarsgaard, Sean Bean, Erika Christensen


No snakes on this plane

just some crazy passengers

and a missing girl


soulmining rating: **

Sunday, December 04, 2005

The loveGods at the Pavilion Theatre

Another loveGods show. I really respect the way they've built up a grass roots following in Brighton, and guitarist Artie and PA Kate are genuinely sweet, friendly people. The band really seem to embrace their music, but I'm increasingly worried about singer Deah. There's no doubting she's a fierce vocal talent - although that affecting American accent is starting to tire - but she also possesses a huge ego. There's a fine line between being a confident, ballsy performer and a spoilt diva. I just hope she takes the former path. Musically the band sound ever more accomplished, but really start to fly when they take a few changes and try something different, like on their radical reworking of Gershwin's Summertime and their Professional Widow rip-off Disco, by far their most adventurous and gleefully enjoyable song of the night.

Note to self: You will get very drunk very quickly if all you've had to eat all day is four slices of toast.

The Proposition Q&A

Jason Wood interviews John Hillcoat & Nick Cave

Director John Hillcoat and writer / composer Nick Cave turned up at the Duke Of York's for a Q&A after a preview screening of their new movie The Proposition. Hove resident Nick bounded onto the stage with a cry of, "Hello neighbours!" and intrigued the audience by confirming that he and John are now collaborating on a romantic comedy set in Hove. "It's not romantic. Or funny," added Nick.

Movie Haiku - The Proposition

www.columbiafilms.com.au


Dir: John Hillcoat


Cast: Guy Pearce, Ray Winstone, Danny Huston, John Hurt


Cave's gloomy western

sent to kill psycho brother

fantastic head shot


soulmining rating: ****

Saturday, December 03, 2005

Gboogleedbok!

Polly sent me this message earlier in the week:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

Yaeh, and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Friday, December 02, 2005

Friday's Frights

Mike with From Dusk Till Dawn's Sex Machine!

Just a few bits and pieces that I wanted to round up this morning.

Mike and Russ were lucky enough to bump into make-up / special effects maestro Tom Savini in The Cinema Store on Wednesday afternoon. Apparently he was a lovely fella and even spoke to Jim on the phone!

Speaking of the Eat My Brains crew, they've just published my review of Jenifer, Dario Argento's Masters Of Horror episode, here.

Congratulations to a couple of other FrightFest friends who this week picked up awards at the British Independent Film Awards ceremony at the Hammersmith Palais - Neil Marshall who won the Best Director award for The Descent, and Jake West who won the Raindance award for Evil Aliens. Well done guys!

Thursday, December 01, 2005

December Live

Man, it's been a bit of a lacklustre Autumn / Winter run in on the live scene. There should be loads of cool bands playing around this time of year but I've found it really tough to come up with much to recommend this month. Anyway, here's the few highlights for December:

01/12 - Tonight it's your Rory Bremners at the Dome. Is he still funny?

02/12 - Feeder are playing at Brighton Centre. I missed them at the Dome last time around but they went down well, and their singles are generally pretty good.

03/12 - I'm going to a preview screening of The Proposition at the Duke Of York's which will be followed by a Q&A with the director John Hillcoat and writer / composer Nick Cave. After that's done it's straight to the Pavilion to check out The loveGods for the final time this year.

08/12 - LCD Soundsystem return to Brighton after their gig at the Concorde at the beginning of the year - this time they're at the Event. How come we're not selling tickets, Dave?

09/12 - Ben Elton is doing his new stand up show at the Dome. Is he still funny?

12/12 - It's a quick return for Stereophonics after their show here in August... they're playing at Brighton Centre this time with support from The Subways.

14/12 - Another Brighton Centre date, this time the first of two nights of Little Britain. Will we all piss ourselves laughing, or will that just be Mrs Emery the incontinent granny?

And that's about it for 2005. Looking ahead to January I've just noticed that Daniel Kitson has announced two shows at the Komedia, so it looks like that will be the first big night out of 2006.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Rufus Wainwright tickets

This is why they're called 'thermal tickets'

Yes, our tickets are made out of fresh Gremlins - put them in direct sunlight and they will burn.

We had it all at the Rufus Wainwright gig tonight. Burnt tickets... lost tickets... people who'd bought stolen tickets outside and had to be chucked out... and one poor lady who'd booked through Get Me Tickets and had been ripped off. Don't ever book tickets through them, they're a bunch of dodgy touts who source their tickets after taking people's orders - and often fail to deliver the goods, as our lady found out tonight. They've recently been investigated by Watchdog, as you can read here.

As for the guest list, well we had Damon Albarn in this evening, Keane's Tom Chaplin (and the family of one of the other Keane chaps), plus the Brighton contigent of the lovely Astrid Williamson and the ever-affable Tim Booth. The only downside tonight was that I didn't get to see any of the show!

Movie Haiku - Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire

www.gobletoffire.co.uk


Dir: Mike Newell


Cast: Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Robbie Coltrane


Hormones are raging

enters tri-wizard contest

harder than sports day


soulmining rating: ****

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

FrightFest does Brighton

Front row (L-R): Rachel, Graham, Rich, Mike and Russ
(photo from www.frightfest.co.uk)

I had such a good laugh on Saturday night with the FrightFest crowd in town as part of Brighton's Cine-City festival at the Duke Of York's cinema. Mike and Russ from Eat My Brains came down for the weekend, and we met up with Rich and Graham - who'd driven down from Romford - in Circus Circus at the start of the evening. FrightFest organisers Ian and Paul soon joined us, Ian regaling us with tales of falling asleep on public transport after too many beers, Paul mainly occupied with his new girlfriend, Honey. Director Jake West introduced himself and proved to be a friendly, jovial chap, which made me feel bad for dissing Evil Aliens so much - but at least I was able to praise his work on the excellent Anchor Bay Phantasm documentary. With a few more FrightFest regulars travelling down, including Rachel from Guildford who we took under our wing after her other friends abandoned her, there was a real feeling of 'extended family' in the pub and this transferred over to the cinema where the audience clapped and cheered their way through the three films on offer. District 13 was the most popular with its mad French stuntmen jumping over buildings without the use of wires or CGI proving to be a big hit. After a specially written message from Dario Argento, his Masters Of Horror episode Jenifer was a little disappointing - delivering more laughs than scares, but it was funny hearing the shocked reactions of the girls sat in the row behind us. In between films Ian and Paul were on hand to give out t-shirts, posters plus the latest Killing Time fanzine, and they also dragged fan Sian onto the stage to display her new FrightFest tattoo. The final film was Boo! which was originally due to play at August's event - it had some good visuals but was let down by wooden acting and dire dialogue, although after a few pints this was all quite amusing. After the last film Mike, Russ and I cracked open some more bottles of beer back at home and wound down watching Hell Comes To Frogtown on video, a dead cert for a future Zombie Club session. All in all, a great evening!

Monday, November 28, 2005

FrightFest Movie Haiku - Boo!

www.kismetent.com/films.html


Dir: Anthony C. Ferrante


Cast: M. Steven Felty, Trish Coren, Rachel Melvin, Dee Wallace Stone


Haunted asylum

laugh at bad acting and script

no applause just boos


soulmining rating: **

FrightFest Movie Haiku - Jenifer

www.mastersofhorror.net


Dir: Dario Argento


Cast: Steven Weber, Carrie Anne Fleming, Brenda Jones, Julia Arkos


Saves her from axeman

great body but freaky face

likes to eat pussy


soulmining rating: ***

You can read my review of Jenifer on Eat My Brains here.

FrightFest Movie Haiku - District 13

www.banlieue13-lefilm.com


Dir: Pierre Morel


Cast: Cyril Raffaelli, David Belle, Tony D'Amario, Dany Verissimo


Leap across buildings

stop neutron bomb, save sister

Escape From Paris


soulmining rating: ****

Friday, November 25, 2005

Killing Time

Just a quick plug for the new Killing Time fanzine. Issue Two has just been published and features articles on directors Rob Zombie, Ti West and Craig Strachan, alongside comment on the recent zombie craze and the demise of Pinhead. Plus, there's a cool Shaun Of The Dead stencil for next year's pumpkin carving and a great spoof advert for Woodloids - "It's going to be a lousy night!"

All this can be yours for a mere £2.50 - get your copy via Paypal here and do your bit to support these guys.

Eubankrupt!

Sometimes the headlines just write themselves.

Yes, Hove's grandest resident, Mr Chris Eubank, declared himself bankrupt yesterday.

You can read the full news story on Yahoo here.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Movie Haiku - The Hidden Blade

www.kakushiken.jp


Dir: Yoji Yamada


Cast: Masatoshi Nagase, Takako Matsu, Hidetaka Yoshioka, Yukiyoshi Ozawa


Can't marry the maid

ordered to kill his old friend

samurai life sucks


soulmining rating: ***

Whatever happened to...?

Continuing the occasional series of actors who have mysteriously vanished from our screens...

3. Rick Moranis

I caught a bit of Ghostbusters on Channel 4 the other night and Rick's name sprung to mind. We all remember him from those two films, and Honey, I Shrunk The Kids and its endless sequels, but surely he must have other work? IMDB lists his last role as one of the vocal talents in Brother Bear but that was two years ago...

So, whatever happened to Rick Moranis?

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Snakes On A Motherf*ckin' Plane!

I've been obsessing over Snakes On A Plane today and have just added the wonderful Snakes On A Blog to my cool links.

You can read more about the forthcoming Snakes On A Plane movie by checking out its listing on IMDB or on Wikipedia.

You gotta admit, you're excited aren't you?

Who needs tickets for the 2006 NME Awards Tour?

NME have just announced dates for their Shockwaves NME Awards Tour 2006 and they'll hit Brighton Dome on Thursday 16th February. Tickets (priced £15.50) are already sold out through NME Tickets but will go on general sale tomorrow... so if you want tickets then get your requests to me by 10am as they're gonna sell out immediately.

This year's tour featured The Killers, Bloc Party, The Futureheads and Kaiser Chiefs and the line up for this forthcoming tour is due to be announced in next week's NME. I'm not party to any insider information but latest rumours suggest that Arctic Monkeys, Maximo Park and We Are Scientists will all be taking part... watch this space!

Movie Haiku - Lower City

www.cidadebaixaofilme.com.br


Dir: Sergio Machado


Cast: Wagner Moura, Lazaro Ramos, Alice Braga, Jose Dummont


She screws two best friends

cockfighting and cocks fighting

should have had threesome


soulmining rating: ***

Bowie lands Prestige role

Be afraid... be very afraid... Bowie's acting again. I don't care though, he's still a hero of mine, therefore I'm quite excited to read the news that he's just been cast alongside Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale and Michael Caine in The Prestige, the new film from Christopher Nolan (Batman Begins) which will begin shooting in January 2006.

"Bowie will play inventor and electrical wizard Nikola Tesla who is approached by one of two competing magicians for help in pulling off the ultimate magic trick in 1878," according to Variety.

How did I get here?

I'm curious to see where my blog traffic is coming from so I've recently signed up with Active Meter to track my visitors. Aside from discovering that most of my hits are just random visits coming from Google Image searches, I have uncovered one or two wonderful search terms which have apparently led here. My favourite ones so far are:
  • Jessica Alba tied up
  • Horny Brighton students
  • Offensive Jimmy Carr t-shirts
  • Susan Sarandon bikini
James, was that you again?

Monday, November 21, 2005

Snakes On A Plane On A T-Shirt!

Regular readers will know that my most eagerly awaited movie of 2006 is Snakes On A Plane - purely because it's called Snakes On A Plane.

Now in an amazing piece of coincidental merchandising, James has not only found the best t-shirt design ever, he's actually bought one of these cool tees, thereby making him the hippest guy in the whole of London town. Or Middlesex. Imagine the fun you could have wearing one of these little beauties, holding your arms out wide and running around making plane type noises! This has just flown right to the top of my Christmas list!

If you want to wear snakes on a plane too, then click here.

Badly Dressed Weather Pixie

I love the Weather Pixie on Kelly's blog, she's extremely dim. Always inappropriately dressed whatever the weather. Just take a look at her here - it's 6 degrees and raining and she's wearing a crop top right up to her boobs... is she mad or just plain desperate?

I have now added my very own Weather Geisha to my blog (bottom left) - if she proves to be too sensible with her attire then I'll just have to trade her in for a different model.

Man Stroke Woman Stroke Minor Celebrities - Get Me Out Of Here!

Faced with the horrifying prospect of the return of Chris Evan's smug, grinning, ginger face on OFI Sunday last night, I quickly switched over to BBC Three. In theory, a good move judging from Vik's comments.

Instead I watched Man Stroke Woman, the much-heralded new sketch show starring the likes of Nick Frost (Shaun Of The Dead) and Nicholas Burns (Nathan Barley). Two laughs in thirty minutes is not a good comedy-per-sketches ratio. Frankly, it's a piss poor effort. And just like BBC Three's dismal second series of Nighty Night, I just know it won't get any better no matter how many more chances I give it. Channel 4's similarly themed Spoons did it much better.

Earlier in the evening I found myself watching the new series of I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here in which another ten micro-celebrities humiliate themselves in the Australian jungle for AntandDec's entertainment. Someone I didn't recognise from Eastenders kept fainting a lot and had to go to hospital, someone I didn't recognise from Emmerdale refused to do a parachute jump - and that was before she even got to camp - Mr Orange (aka David Dickinson) bossed Rickyyyyy (Sid Owen - the most likely winner) around in their 'bush tucker challenge', and we got to watch Carol Thatcher having a wee-wee in the night. No-one needs to see that image on television. Ever. Yet with the creeping inevitability of a dog returning to its own vomit, I know I'll be watching again tonight...

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now

I've been doing a lot of thinking this weekend.

Blogging is supposed to be fun, never a chore, yet recently my movie reviews have become just that - something done out of a sense of duty, rather than out of pleasure. The real problem is that my cinema addiction means that I see on average two films a week (I've seen 101 films at the cinema this year to date) and that's a lot of reviewing to do. Maybe it's just laziness on my part, but I'm just finding that it's eating into my life too much and I've got to stop. I was going to wait until the New Year, but it's no good... it's just zapping away at my energy and making me feel down, so no more.

The haikus will continue, along with my ratings, and I'll still write reviews for genre films - but these will be exclusively for the Eat My Brains website.

Of course I reserve the right to change my mind at any time, so this post could turn out to be a load of old bollocks!

Saturday, November 19, 2005

EMB turn to The Dark Side

Congratulations to Mike, Jim and Russ from Eat My Brains - the lads have landed their first magazine feature, published in this month's edition of The Dark Side!

Their own unique take on August's FrightFest event runs across pages 38-42 of Issue 118 (the one with a cover-mounted DVD of Cold Eyes Of Fear on the front), which is available in all good newsagents now.

You can read my own account of FrightFest on their website here.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Skin at the Concorde

The last time I saw Skin at the Concorde I was absolutely hammered, so it was good to approach this performance in a more sober frame of mind - although that didn't last too long! She was fantastic though, belting out a mixture of old Skunk Anansie songs, stuff from her first solo album Flesh Wounds - including the awesome Trashed and a wicked cover of Electronic's Getting Away With It - and a selection of tracks from her forthcoming album, Fake Chemical State.

Movie Haiku - A Cock And Bull Story

www.redbus.comsgrp.com


Dir: Michael Winterbottom


Cast: Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon, Jeremy Northam, Keeley Hawes


Watch Tristram get born

then watch the film crew watching

Steve's back in the womb


soulmining rating: ***

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Life on Babelfish?

Thanks to Kelly for this suggestion... Take some song lyrics, translate them on Babelfish, and then translate them back into English again!

So here's the chorus of The The's Soul Mining:

Something always goes wrong when things are going right,
You've swallowed your pride to quell the pain inside,
Someone captured your heart like a thief in the night,
And squeezed all the juice out until it ran dry.


And here's the English-Japanese-English translation:

When as for something always thing has gone just in order in to calm pain,
Your pride which is swallowed as for someone who goes by mistake like the thief of the night until it captured the center of the hatchet,
It dried moved juice everything was squeezed.

So, then I tried the chorus of David Bowie's Life On Mars?:

Sailors fighting in the dance hall,
Oh man! Look at those cavemen go,
It's the freakiest show,
Take a look at the lawman beating up the wrong guy,
Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know,
He's in the best selling show,
Is there life on Mars?


Which gave me this English-Japanese-English translation:

The person of crew Ohio state which fights with the dance hall!
Those hole staying people it goes,
That it is and / or the most whimsical show,
Tries looking at the legal process server which has been struck on the person and the person of Ohio state whom you make a mistake,
See! Whether or not him in the best sale show,
There Mars life him think in the doubt which has been known?

Genius.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Movie Haiku - The Constant Gardener

www.theconstantgardener.com


Dir: Fernando Meirelles


Cast: Raplh Fiennes, Rachel Weisz, Danny Huston, Bill Nighy


Why is his wife dead?

uncovers dodgy drug trials

not much gardening


soulmining rating: ****

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Play It Cool in November

I've really cut back on my CD buying lately. This is no bad thing; I already have far too many for my groaning shelves, and a three piles on my bedroom floor just waiting to find new homes via eBay. Still, there's always new tunes to discover, and these are the ones which have been hogging my stereo this month:

  • Serena Maneesh - Serena-Maneesh (Honeymilk)
  • Ladytron - Witching Hour (Island)
  • Gemma Hayes - The Roads Don't Love You (Source)
  • Feeder - Shatter / Tender (Echo) single
  • Depeche Mode - Precious (Mute) single
Don't know what's gonna crop up next month, but I've been impressed with the Arcade Fire tracks I've heard and I really like Madonna's Hung Up single, so we'll see...

Movie Haiku - Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

www.kisskiss-bangbangmovie.co.uk


Dir: Shane Black


Cast: Robert Downey Jr, Val Kilmer, Michelle Monaghan, Corbin Bernsen


Fag and New Yorker

banter makes you laugh out loud

dog ate his finger


Shane Black wrote the scripts for seminal action flicks Lethal Weapon and The Last Boy Scout, pocketed $4 million for The Long Kiss Goodnight and then disappeared in a cocktail of booze, drugs and hookers (probably). One nervous breakdown later and he's back with Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, a satire on the buddy movie which also marks his directorial debut. Harry Lockhart (Downey Jr) is a petty thief who ends up tagging along with private eye Gay Perry (Kilmer) after bursting in on a Hollywood audition and being hired on the spot in a classic case of mistaken identity. Perry's latest case involves the daughter of a producer (Bernsen) who turns up dead in a lake, whilst Harry is falling for wannabe actress Harmony (Monaghan) - who just happens to be his pal from back home - whose sister also turns up dead in LA. Of course, like the 'Johnny Gossamer' novels that the movie references, this is pure pulp fiction, so we just know that these two seemingly seperate cases are going to be connected. As thrillers go, it hits all the right notes, throwing in enough red herrings and holding the interest commendably. There's none of the explosive set-pieces you might imagine from Black's action-packed pedigree; sure, there's a few thrills along the way but largely Kiss Kiss Bang Bang keeps its feet on the ground rather than riding the blockbuster cliches - and it's all the better for that. Where the film excels - and this won't come as a shock to fans familiar with Black's oeuvre - is in the writing. Within five minutes I was sold on this film and I found myself laughing out loud more times at the cynical, sarcastic repartee than in any supposed 'straight' comedy this year. But it's more than just Black's dialgoue, it's his whole approach, his constant breaking of genre conventions. This is one smart, savvy Hollywood satire - perfectly encapsulated in Harry's inept narration causing him to halt the film and rewind to add the little details he missed, or in Harry and Perry's messages to the watching audience as the film is winding to a close. It certainly helps that all three of the lead actors are on top form here. Downey Jr is just perfect as the (not quite so) innocent caught up in this surreal city, and he's subjected to the type of physical abuse more akin to Bruce Campbell in the Evil Dead films! Kilmer gives his best performance in years and newcomer Monaghan smoulders like a modern day femme fatale, oozing sex appeal, yet with edge to her that keeps you questioning whether she's really Harry's dream girl, or if she's just using him as a pawn in a more sinister game. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang might have proved too sophisticated for middle America, but it should find a more appreciative response over here and I urge you to go and see it - it really is a gloriously entertaining action-comedy-thriller-satire of the highest calibre.

soulmining rating: *****

Monday, November 14, 2005

Greatest Hit

Thanks to everyone who's been stopping by my blog recently, the counter has really been clocking up those hits over the past month. So to celebrate, if you're the magical 10,000th visitor this week then send me a screen grab of the page and in turn I'll send you a special prize!

(Disclaimer: By 'special prize' I mean some random item that I was planning to sell on eBay if only I could be bothered)

Saturday, November 12, 2005

New Order at Brixton Academy

From the NME website, as I'm too lazy to write anything myself!

"New Order performed a collection of classic anthems and legendary Joy Division songs last night (November 10) for the first of two special shows in London and Manchester. The legendary four-piece treated fans to a 90-minute set at Brixton Academy packed with hits from their back catalogue including Ceremony, Bizarre Love Triangle, Temptation, True Faith, Regret and Blue Monday, a song which the band were forced to cut from their Glastonbury set this year. They also threw in Joy Division favourites Transmission, Love Will Tear Us Apart, Shadowplay and Warsaw. During the encore, singer Bernard Sumner even pulled their video producer Michael Shamberg up on stage for a special dedication. The New Order frontman said: "We would like to dedicate this next track to Michael Shamberg. Give him a cheer, he hasn't been very well lately," before Sumner launched into the Joy Division track Shadowplay. He also took a swipe at Green Day after performing early hit Warsaw when he said: "That was one of our first singles and that is what shit Green Day try and play". They closed the set with She's Lost Control."

That New Order setlist in full:

  • Ceremony
  • Love Vigilantes
  • Crystal
  • Regret
  • Krafty
  • Turn
  • Transmission
  • Your Silent Face
  • Waiting For The Sirens Call
  • True Faith
  • Bizarre Love Triangle
  • Love Will Tear Us Apart
  • Temptation
  • Blue Monday
  • Shadowplay
  • Warsaw
  • She's Lost Control
Seeing New Order live after so many years was an undoubted highlight of a wholly entertaining day - for an 'electronic' band their sound was a lot beefier than I'd expected. During the afternoon I hung out in my favourite bar in Chinatown with James, Mike and Stevie B where we took full advantage of their 2 for 1 offer on cocktails and talked a lot of nonsense about films. The journey home with Stevie B was enlivened by a couple of kids who'd got on the wrong train and a drunk lady who was bothering the bloke opposite (while we pretended to be asleep) and then passed out on the seat next to me - and refused to budge once we reached Brighton. After finding the biggest puddle of mud in Victoria Gardens which absolutely caked my shoes and jeans as we walked home, we then got accosted on Edward Street by another wino desperate for a smoke, who then got all stroppy when we walked off instead of staying to listen to her no doubt fascinating story about her dropping her bottle of wine... aaaah, the delights of excessive drinking!

Mau rien mai?

Just look at that huge pitcher of beer! Some things never change, eh? My Thai friend Earn just sent me this pic of her (right) with our friend Nok. I haven't seen the two of them together since early 2002 when they were both working at the Sax Music Pub in Chiang Mai - Earn got married that year and moved to Shropshire, whilst Nok moved to Holland earlier this year to live with boyfriend Johnny. I'm guessing this photo was taken in Amsterdam, but Earn neglected to say where they met up. Ladies, any more news for me? "Chock Dii puen, pom kit khun mii sanuk mak-mak!"

Friday, November 11, 2005

The Sad Silver Cyberman

Fresh off the BBC website here's the brand new design for the Cybermen, who are due to return in the new series of Doctor Who in 2006. Is it just me, or does this new makeover make them seem half as scary as the previous designs? Just look at his sad little face, the poor silver chappy looks like he's about to cry...

In other television news, Variety reports that David Cronenberg is apparently working on an adaptation of his own 1988 film, Dead Ringers, for HBO. Yup, that was the one about the twin gynecologists...

Finally, The Mighty Boosh are taking their show on the road - hitting Brighton on 11th February!