Movie Haiku - Saw II

www.saw2.com


Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman


Cast: Donnie Wahlberg, Shawnee Smith, Tobin Bell, Dina Meyer


My plot for Saw III

make chav viewers wear death masks

if they talk they die


What is it with people talking during movies? Trying to focus amidst the incessant chatter I couldn’t help wondering if there is to be a Saw III then perhaps the screenwriters might consider utilising talkative cinema-goers as the next victims of the Jigsaw Killer. Here in Saw II, our murderous cancer-sufferer (Bell) has assembled another roomful of lowlifes, petty criminals and self-abusers to torture. Amongst these miscreants are young Daniel (Erik Knudsen), son of Detective Eric Matthews (Wahlberg) who is currently on Jigsaw’s trail, and Amanda (Smith) who was the sole survivor of his previous reign of terror. These eight people share something in common, as they’ll soon discover. Meanwhile Jigsaw has been leaving clues for Eric which lead him and his team to his current lair, littered with video monitors trained upon the aforementioned house. Deadly nerve gas is slowly being pumped into the building which will cause the eight hostages to die within two hours unless they can escape. There are syringes containing an antidote hidden around the rooms for each individual, but acquiring them is no easy task – it’s like a deadly edition of The Crystal Maze! Jigsaw is prepared to make a bargain with Eric however; if Eric does exactly what he says for the next two hours then he promises to return Daniel to him unharmed. And so the games begin. Without the element of surprise about Jigsaw's identity, screenwriters Leigh Whannell and Bousman have instead concentrated on the intricacies of his latest game. After the stunning denouement at the end of Saw, we’re expecting a few twists along the way and Saw II certainly delivers these – although I’d argue that one plot twist is obvious very early on if you’re the suspicious type. The other element that has been amped up for the sequel is the nature of the killer’s instruments of torture. The film begins with a slightly different riff on that old favourite of his, the death mask, in an opening scene that had people around me wincing and screeching in disgust. There are a couple of equally unpleasant and distasteful traps awaiting our eight inmates, but I’ll leave you to discover their delights for yourselves – suffice to say if you have any kind of phobia about sharp instruments or needles then this is most definitely not the movie for you. Whilst the ‘eeuwch!’ factor is still present and correct, the uninspiring premise and characters dilute its impact somewhat. The biggest problem with Saw II is its new cast of characters who are barely sketched and merely cyphers for the action. Eric is supposed to be the leading man, someone we can sympathise with, but he’s just an arrogant bully, and it’s also hard to feel for any of the people trapped in the house when they too are all a bunch of scumbags. The fact that one of them, Xavier (Franky G), starts his own personal battle with the others simply exacerbates the situation. With the casting of Donnie Wahlberg, the producers have done themselves no favours in the acting stakes, and the supporting actors are by and large equally poor. The one notable exception is Tobin Bell, who actually gets a chance to embrace his role to the full this time, and rasps away with a gleeful menace as he reveals a bit more about his background. Overall then Saw II is a functional sequel and no more than that. Sure, it’s an hour and a half of fun entertainment but it won’t haunt you in quite the same way that Saw did on first viewing. It has however given me one bright idea – maybe the cinemas could patent Jigsaw’s death masks and insist that all patrons wear these when watching the film. At the first sounds of chatter the traps would close and the auditorium would be silent once more, free from the unwanted comments of those inconsiderate audience members. You’ve got to admit, it would make a great deterrent!

soulmining rating: ***

You can read an expanded version of this review at Eat My Brains here.